strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.