I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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Boinked my neighbor

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.