rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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make south park refferences every day

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I chew my ice cream.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.