Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.