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Clarksonisms
Japan is Weird
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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.
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-42
Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?
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-42
Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises
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-42
Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago
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-46
pretend your on the phone talking to someone to make you look like you not a loner
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-52
get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.
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-52
When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public
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-54
when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength
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-54
When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.
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-54
Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.
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-58
rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.
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-64
Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)
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-64
Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.
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-68
I can't piss with my shoes on.
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-70
Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <
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-72
I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim
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-78
Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club
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-82
When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)
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-86
I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.
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-86
When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning
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-90
You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.
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-90
Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.
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-90
Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry
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-92
I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)
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-94
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.