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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

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While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

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I cant ride a bike

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Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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blink

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Ur mum

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.