eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

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Sometimes I toot.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.