- Things You Think Only You Do

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

not be afraid of hurricane sandy

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.