I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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I always try to play it cool and act like it’s no big deal. But I always have a mini anxiety attack before actually stepping onto a moving escalator. It is a task trying to time my step perfectly where my foot isn’t hanging off a step and I have to hurry my second foot on there isn’t an awdward space of steps between my feet. -Ikka

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.