i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Tear up when I poop

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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I read the down voted posts

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.