When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

thumb_up thumb_down -31

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

thumb_up thumb_down -35

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.