Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.