Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.