Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.