feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Use my phone to see what time it is

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

thumb_up thumb_down

I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

when you are on EXCEL file on your computer, you scroll down so far, that it goes to 1000

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.