Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.