Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.