Ur mum

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.