- Things You Think Only You Do

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Sitting down in the shower

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

I was the real Stig...

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.