When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

I can't piss with my shoes on.

Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

Pretend you are turning Super Saiyan when sat on the toilet

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.