When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

I was the real Stig...

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.