Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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Sometimes I toot.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.