I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

Picking my nose.

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.