When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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fap

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Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.