When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.