it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.