When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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Stare at something long enough thinking it will eventually move.

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.