when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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The older I get the more honest I get

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.