sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

thumb_up thumb_down -16

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

thumb_up thumb_down -16

get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

thumb_up thumb_down -18

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

thumb_up thumb_down -30

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.