Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.