sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.