Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

I have memorized my drivers license registration number

When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

I Masturbate Daily.

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.