look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.