- Things You Think Only You Do

When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

only read the short jokes on this website

when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

Ur mum

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.