i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

I have a phobia of incest

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Go for a 10 mile run.

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.