see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

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Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

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i masturbate with my feet

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.