When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I refuse to take dump with the shower curtain closed. I know someone's behind it...

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.