- Things You Think Only You Do

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Courtesy flush.

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

sometimes sigh sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.