- Things You Think Only You Do

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

sometimes sigh sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.