When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

use tweezers to pull out leg hair or armpit hair out of sheer boredom.

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

I lift my butt when I'm farting

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.