read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.