when i listen to music in my earphones, i always pretend its me performing the song to an audience.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

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Keep trying to defend your point even after you've realized you're wrong in an argument

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.