Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

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fall asleep in the shower.

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Drool a lil bit and continue eating...

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After masterbating, I wonder if my dead relatives can just see what I did?

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.