Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

I scratch and sniff.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

pee when you are dreaming haha lol

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.