Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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I scratch and sniff.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.