Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.