TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Sometimes I toot.

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.