Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

I cant ride a bike

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

I don't read the terms of service.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

test how many stares you can scale in one step

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.