Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

I chew my ice cream.

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

Mayada stupid

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.