- Things You Think Only You Do

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.