Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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I cant ride a bike

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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I don't read the terms of service.

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.