go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Ur mum

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

Courtesy flush.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

I rehearse arguments in my head.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

Only use the left earphone.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

Believing in the kindness of strangers

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

I **** with no hands.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.