- Things You Think Only You Do

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

Be a loner at school

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.