- Things You Think Only You Do

I have a phobia of incest

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.