Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Do somthing only you do

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.