I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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make south park refferences every day

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.