Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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I cant ride a bike

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.