When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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when i talk to someone, and the one where i am talking with is saying a sentence very fast, am going to repeat the whole sentence in my head and then it sounds really weird.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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Smoking in the shower.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Ur mum

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.