- Things You Think Only You Do

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

I used to eat bath bubbles

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.