- Things You Think Only You Do

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.