When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.