Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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Sometimes I toot.

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.