When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Ur mum

When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.