Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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sitting in the passenger seat of the car, move my head around gently to guide a piece of dirt on the window in the foreground around the obstacle course of trees, streetlights etc in the background. Also, imagine my eyes are projecting lasers which cut through anything and carve the passing world up to my design.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.