Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

test how many stares you can scale in one step

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

Ur mum

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.