- Things You Think Only You Do

Sometimes I toot.

I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

get a new to you car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.