DIY LOL
Clarksonisms
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yo ima let you finish
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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.
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+7
If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.
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+5
Use my phone to see what time it is
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+3
Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.
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-3
TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.
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-3
Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!
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-3
Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.
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-3
I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.
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-5
Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away
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-5
Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.
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-7
(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)
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-7
Sometimes I toot.
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-7
Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????
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-7
turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.
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-9
You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt
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-9
cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug
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-13
When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.
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-13
Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.
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-13
Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.
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-15
I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.
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-15
Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.
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-15
Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to
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-19
Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.
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-21
Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember
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-21
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.