Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

thumb_up thumb_down -113

I have a phobia of incest

thumb_up thumb_down -123

Make up a song to yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -155

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

I sleep in my underpants every single night

thumb_up thumb_down +30

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

thumb_up thumb_down +18

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

not be afraid of hurricane sandy

thumb_up thumb_down

I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

thumb_up thumb_down

I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

thumb_up thumb_down

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.