- Things You Think Only You Do

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

Being fat

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

I can't piss with my shoes on.

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.