I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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I chew my ice cream.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.