Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.