I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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I hit the frig after sex

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.