- Things You Think Only You Do

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

I wonder if elections are rigged?

Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.