Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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I **** with no hands.

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.