- Things You Think Only You Do

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Courtesy flush.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.