- Things You Think Only You Do

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....fap fap fap"

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

Stab myself on a daily basis

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

When ever I'm walking up or down stairs, i always have to step on the last step with my left foot.

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.