see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.