- Things You Think Only You Do

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

Only use the left earphone.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.