see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

Ur mum

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

I rehearse arguments in my head.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

fap

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

Courtesy flush.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.