I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

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Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.