I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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I **** with no hands.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Put my hands together the 'other' way

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Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

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I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.