- Things You Think Only You Do

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

when passing someone in a car beside you, you try to wonder where they are going just by looking at them, their clothes or their expressions

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

test how many stares you can scale in one step

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.