Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.