Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Make hand gestures when talking on phone

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Smoking a cigarette on the toilet and then accidentally ashing directly into your panties. Everytime.

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

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Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.