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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.