Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.