Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.