When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Think that when you're reading something or watching tv some people somewhere are knowing what your watching or whether or not you understand what you just read so you don't wanna reread it to risk looking stupid.

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Make up a song to yourself.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.