Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

Being fat

Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.