I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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I have a phobia of incest

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.