I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

I don't read the terms of service.

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.