Being fat

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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I **** with no hands.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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I have a phobia of incest

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.