when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Only use the left earphone.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Being fat

thumb_up thumb_down -62

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

thumb_up thumb_down -64

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -78

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

thumb_up thumb_down -80

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -84

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

thumb_up thumb_down -132

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.