- Things You Think Only You Do

I have dreams that I am really rich and wake up to be thankful for my life just the way it is

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

Sometimes I toot.

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.