When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.