When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.