I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.