- Things You Think Only You Do

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

fap

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.