Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.