get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

I think Frozen is an overrated film

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.