fall asleep in the shower.

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Sitting down in the shower

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.