Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

The older I get the more honest I get

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.