I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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I always think I have special powers

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I scratch and sniff.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.