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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.
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-68
When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.
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-68
When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.
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-68
I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol
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-68
I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.
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-72
When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.
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-72
Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.
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-76
Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum
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-78
You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.
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-92
I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava
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-108
Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .
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-112
Make up a song to yourself.
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-158
If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.
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+41
When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......
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+39
Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny
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+37
Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D
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+35
dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!
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+25
At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.
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+21
Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.
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+19
Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.
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+17
right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...
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+17
Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."
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+15
Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.
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+11
When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.
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+9
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.