- Things You Think Only You Do

When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.