(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

When i am home alone i think there are hidden cameras in my house and wave at objects that might conceal the camers to scare the people looking through them

When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.