When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

thumb_up thumb_down -74

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

thumb_up thumb_down -80

I gotta get down of Friday

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Put my hands together the 'other' way

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

thumb_up thumb_down -104

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

thumb_up thumb_down -108

when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

thumb_up thumb_down -122

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

thumb_up thumb_down +37

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I hit the frig after sex

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.