I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.