I stick used soap to a new soap so I don't waste it.

I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

I wonder if elections are rigged?

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.