Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.