I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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I hit the frig after sex

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.