When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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Sometimes I toot.

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.