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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!
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+22
Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?
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+20
When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up
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+18
Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.
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+18
Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.
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+16
Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.
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+12
Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.
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+12
I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man
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+12
When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.
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+10
Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment
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+10
Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.
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+10
Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.
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+8
Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."
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+8
When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)
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+6
I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?
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+6
Stab myself on a daily basis
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+6
Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.
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+6
I chew my ice cream.
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+4
When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.
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+2
When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.
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+2
When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.
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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.
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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"
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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.