i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.