Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.