Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

I talk to inanimate objects daily.

When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

the time where you sit behind a person that smells like BO badly!!!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.