- Things You Think Only You Do

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

pull out a flies wings and let it go

thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

Be a loner at school

Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.