Justin Beiber is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I lift my butt when I'm farting

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -42

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

thumb_up thumb_down -50

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.