You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

Stab myself on a daily basis

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

I chew my ice cream.

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.