- Things You Think Only You Do

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

I think Frozen is an overrated film

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.