Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

thumb_up thumb_down -15

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Never using a 0 or a 5 as the last digit while using a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

im going to RAPEEEE that girl

thumb_up thumb_down -137

close left eye, then right eye to see how things move....

thumb_up thumb_down -141

Shit in the shower and pushing it down the drain with your feet

thumb_up thumb_down -151

lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

thumb down this post

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

scripting the blackboard with your fingernails? no problem, but just the imagination of biting on an ice cream stick out of wood and then moving it through your teeth makes me go crazy!

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Suppress a sneeze and then walk around unsatisfied.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

thumb_up thumb_down +44

I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

if im alone and singing to music, i watch myself in the mirror

thumb_up thumb_down +7

misread flashlight

thumb_up thumb_down +68

When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.