Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

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I pee in the shower.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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when someone is playing a song which i really like but don't know the name of it i either try to guess the name by the lyrics or i try to read the name from their iPod without them noticing and then immediately make a note on my mobile and saving it.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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When home alone, you feel the need to turn on every light/appliance so you won't hear the serial killer who you are sure hides in your basement

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Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

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I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

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Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

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Sometimes when I touch something I have to touch all of the object and with both hands, otherwise I feel incomplete.

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When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

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When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

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every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

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when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

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in my eyes all my friends have an easier life than myself. their exams are easier, their teacher are cooler...

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Pronouncing 'garage' as 'grozhh'

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

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When I go up the stairs, I always have to end on my right foot. If I have to, I will even hop on one foot on the last stair in order to land on it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.