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Anti-Pickup Line
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Things You Think Only You Do
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While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat
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-16
always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.
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-28
On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.
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-54
Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.
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-54
Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).
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-106
losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again
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-5
Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)
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-10
Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,
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-44
Breathe.
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-104
pinch the tip of my dick when I masturbate.
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-45
When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled.
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-59
When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.
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+20
Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.
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-4
invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.
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-30
you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.
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-36
wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...
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-54
Wrap up inside a sleeping bag and slide down the steps.
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+141
When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.
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+59
Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.
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+9
Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.
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-21
I pee in the shower.
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-23
when baking cookies I eat waaayyy too much of the dough, to the point that I don't even want any of the cookies when I am finished baking them.
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-33
Any time I break something, I always try to put it back so it looks completely normal. That way, the next person who picks it up will have it break right in their hands… Thus becoming their fault... -Ikka
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-53
I purposely try to burp as loud as I can in public. –Ikka.
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-107
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.