Eat goldfish and cheez-its salt side down.

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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Breathe.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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misread flashlight

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i use my thumb when using a DS instead of using the stylus

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Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

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Has to cover up with a blanket, regardless of the temperature...

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When the car runs over bumps in the road on the freeway, they sound like horses hooves, so I pretend my car's being pulled by invisible horses.

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I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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if im alone and singing to music, i watch myself in the mirror

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get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.

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I use the power-stance sometimes when I poop. It's where you completely remove one leg from your pants and put the shoe back on. Your legs can go further apart.

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when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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I sleep in the nude.

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On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.

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Pronouncing 'garage' as 'grozhh'

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Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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Sometimes when my mom is aking me something and then i tell her the truth i start smirking automatically as if i'd be lying because i don't know how to make a serious face

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Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!

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in my eyes all my friends have an easier life than myself. their exams are easier, their teacher are cooler...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.