take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

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When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka

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Sometimes I just space out for a period of time and completely forget that I'm breathing. Then when I snap out of it, I kind of breathe deeply because I thought I forgot to breathe.

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When peeing, if I get pee on the seat I will flush the toilet before wiping it and then see if I can quickly wipe it and toss the toilet paper in the toilet before it finishes flushing.

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

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Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

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When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

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I like to poo while smoking.

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Get so angry you hit a table, wall etc but hit it so hard you feel as though you've broken you fingers and this just makes you even angrier.

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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use cleverbot to chat to automated dating chat bots. even if i don't understand swedish.

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When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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I click that I have read the Terms of Service although I haven't read sheit

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I keep tearing the little piece of skin next to my thumb nail until it hurts - and even if it bleeds I have to get it off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.